the thing about like activism is it’s so tiring? at some point you just want to start arguing, like I spent the majority of my blogging the last year or so talking about social justice and it wears at you so much, people willing to so violently disagree with you and people willing to support oppressive concepts and it is tiring
and not to mention your message has such a limited scope, for every time you talk about how it’s fucked up to say cisphobia is the same as transphobia, there’s 10k notes on a comic saying “never be mean ever uwu” and it feels like nothing ever changes
and idk man there’s only so much you can take b4 people get the best of you and you grow cynical and u just….don’t care anymore? like I do care about human rights and where they are so severely lacking in some parts of society(not to mention other societies), but this battle takes a bit of your soul and it’s at the point where I’m like yeah opression sucks but talking about it isn’t making it go away, it’s just keeping the wound fresh in my mind
idk I have something wrong with me and can’t articulate very well at all but im so tired
the reason i needed that petition was for the same reason that i need facebook adding custom genders. acknowledgement. it could introduce a large population of people to an idea. the idea that i exist.
the petition was pretty bad. it wasn’t clear on what we wanted or needed and it was probably written by a single person. however if it had hit it’s goal and the white house said “sure let’s do it” they would have worked with actual trans groups and not just copied what was written on the site and drafted it into a bill.
but it would have been denied. and in the end the acknowledgement was the only thing i wanted and the only thing i needed. because i’d rather have you standing in front of me trying to pretend i’m not there than not even be able to see me.
also there’s one part at the end of that post that’s really getting to me and its that ”plenty of people wouldn’t even be able to make use of it, can you imagine how much harder it would be to deal with cis people when the fact that you’re trans is apparent before they even see you?”
having to misgender myself when i fill out a job application or apply to a school or for it to be apparent in someone else’s mind that i’m a boy before they even see me, is not better than having people know i’m trans.